Good morning to all my faithful readers. This is sort of a two part post continued from yesterday. I read in some NA literature that the first step toward self acceptance is acceptance of my addiction. Now for me this is so much more than just my addiction to drugs. When I say that I am an addict, I mean I am a fucking addict. I am addicted to things, or maybe I should say, I am addicted even to doing things that would make most of you think differently of me. I am not just addicted to the drugs, but also the life that comes with it. I am addicted to things that may not even have ANYTHING to do with drugs or that life. Friday I publicly apologized to a bank teller I fucking went off on last week for simply doing her job. I hope she felt better, because I do. With self acceptance, to me comes with the ability to notice these little things that will fuck my head and my heart up, and do something different. To not just accept it and expect everyone around me to accept it and condone these things because of who I am, but make an effort to be a better person no matter how uncomfortable it may be at first. If it is something that proves to be difficult , well then I give it to God and pray my ass off. This has become routine for me, but I am human, I do still make mistakes and say and do hurtful shit. So after seeing and hearing several other people do this, so shall I. If I have wronged you or hurt you in any way shape or form, I sincerely apologize. I will do this in person to anyone who wishes to reach out to me and discuss this further. Today, not only do I accept who and what I am, I own it. Today and from now on will make even more of a conscious effort to recognize and change these behaviors I have come to be addicted to. I hope you all have a blessed day and your upcoming week is full of great things. To those of you out there in the grip of it, I pray that today is the day your life changes for the better as mine has and continues to.I can do all things through Christ! God Bless! If nobody told you today, I love you and you matter!