Crawling!


Good morning friends! Yeah thats todays catalyst song. Crawling by Lincoln Park. Really good song by an artist I never knew I liked so much until I heard them again for the first time. This song really hits home with me. If you can really listen to it and hear the lyrics you will know why. So often I confuse what is real. I don’t mean I am losing my grip on reality again, but I confuse what is real, who is real. Words and feelings are thrown around with wild disconcert for anyones feelings. I confuse a lot of things daily, losing myself and finding him multiple times. Not knowing or constantly finding myself and discovering who I am is tiring at times and I tend to get confused as this is all still so new to me. The walls that confine me are the ones I build or put up. Some are still needed, the walls. Some are up because I know no other way yet to protect myself, my feelings. Some of these walls that still exist are being smashed as my self-confidence grows, while others I take down brick by brick, slowly peeking my head over to make sure its safe. Progress, not perfection right? I love myself today, a love I discovered a few months back. I am happy with the man I have become and strive to be. But the struggle is real folks. I still have those days where I am crawling in my skin because I confuse what is real as he says in the song. It seems like it happens on the days when nothing is really going wrong, like the old me just wants to stir shit up for some reason. I make it through though by praying and doing the next right thing. By staying positive no matter what and holding onto the love in my heart. I am learning what it means to be a friend and making new ones along the way. Met some really cool people lately. If your reading this, you know who you are! Pointedly right? isn’twin_20170119_08_11_12_pro that what you said? Haha! Yeah so have a good listen to this song, its really good! To those of you out there in the grip of it, I pray that today is the day your life changes for the better as mine has. Keep a hold of what you know to be real and true, who you are or what you want to be! God bless. I love you and you matter!

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