Good morning to all my true believers again. Double dipping today because I have so much to say, to be grateful for. I can only wish this post doesn’t fall on deaf ears as most probably do because as the sing says my written words will last longer than my heart will beat! Nine months ago I didn’t believe in anything. I made a decision to die. To not take that next hit and get sick so I could learn how to live. Clouds of doubt? Naw not today and tomorrow’s looking good too! More like rising up out of the smoke after the last ash has dropped from the fire i set. The fire from my entire world burning to the ground nine months ago as I flushed a half gram down the toilet at dunes house with George and Jay. Thanks again guys for holding my hand through that, literally. I had to and still am learning how to live! Scary shit man! Scary shit! But I have and hold on to faith, hope and love these days! Rachel, you showed me what LOVE means. Miss Toni, you showed me what it means to be a friend! I love you guys! I wish more people could just believe! Believe in themselves! We as addicts are harder in ourselves than any unjust judgment could ever be. Remember that next time you see someone in the fucking grip, throw out a hand or open arms before a judgment! The struggle is real! I gotta go get into work now and wash my face because I’ve Ben crying for an hour straight! My tears though, yeah they are for you out there in the grip, fighting for that next breath! To those of you out there in the grip or it, I pray, harder than ever, that today brings you peace and warmth! God bless and look up, that’s where you’ll find me! Stay up. I live you and you fucking matter to me!!!