Hey! So as many of you may or may not have noticed, I’ve been going through it lately. The reasons, well let’s just let them lay where they are for a while they are of little importance to me anymore. The main phrase on in my blog here, the struggle is real, is a motherfucker! I sometimes lose grasp of just how real it is. I’m far from perfect and make many mistakes daily. Shit, I don’t need drugs and alcohol to make stupid decisions. My thoughts and emotions are or at least were easily influenced. This was a near fatal blow for me. Allowing my love for another to cause me to go almost blind! I may be down, but i sure as fuck ain’t out! This to shall pass and without drugs and alcohol to make it a million times worse and seemingly impossible to recover from, shall pass much quicker and a little less like a gall stone. I have truly, and I mean truly been shown just who is real and honest and there for me the past two weeks! To those of you who were and continue to be, much love and mad respect! Thank you for showing me what real is! Real friends! Real family! I have a new love for life because i just about lost it the past couple of days! Sitting still and not mak8ng a move proved itself a worthy tool in my fight against addiction. And i don’t just mean to drugs and alcohol! You see, i am okay with being alone today. If your presence in my life only causes pain and heartache and worry and lies, then you will no longer be in my life for i will be just a figment of a dream you once had and lost, or should i say three away! The struggle is fucking real man! I may make certain shit look easu, but I hurt for i have been cut deeper the past few days than ever before in my life! It’s okay though! I needed this to happen. I am Kay, and i am an addict! I love you and you matter to me! Stay up, way the fuck up!