The Conspiracy Within…


Buenas Dias out there! Can you feel me this morning? I hope you can feel something and it ain’t pain! All too often, when I find myself broken, blued up from the shoe up, and bleeding, long after the world has been burnt to the fucking ground, and I am standing there bleeding with the matches in my hand, I am bleeding that blood I made me bleed.

Its a blood redder than I have ever known. Lost in the inner battle with my double conscience. Doing right when no one is looking is not as easy to act upon as it is to write down. Its a decision, a conscious choice if you will that takes time to become as natural as the next breath of air I breathe. I get tired, no exhausted after dogmatic tradition has exploited all I am from me except the blood I bleed when I make me bleed. Its an epic battle with the conspiracy within. It’s a war that will never end for me. It’s just a compilation of battles, daily battles. The war itself rages on like a wildfire out of control, without the ability to be controlled so it must be allowed to burn out and the pathway cleared of its destruction that will be inevitably total and fierce. So I sit and write and smile until it fucking hurts! I am Jay and I am an addict! Let me in or let me down! To those of you out there in the grip, I pray. God bless and stay up. I love you and you matter to me!WIN_20170901_05_04_20_Pro

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