15 Months on The Edge…

Buenas Dias out there! 15 motherfucking months the hard way! How bout that?!

15 months on the edge of my comfort zone! 15 months of stretching and reaching! 15 months of goals in my scope! One shot, aim it well. My people on the sidelines yellin give em hell! 15 months with the Devil tryin to keep me at bay. 15 months of pain and the struggle is real! 15 months of learning how to heal! 15 months learning how to feal. 15 months of learning who and what is real. 15 months of facing my fears. 15 months of out of nowhere tears. 15 months? Feels more like 15 years! 15 months of walking into the lion’s den. 15 months of feeling like pulling the pin. 15 months of life slammin my face to the ground. 15 months of falling down but getting back up. I’m tired but I can’t sleep. I woke up and it’s Christmas morning again! I am Jay and I am a fucking addict.

15 months of living and laughing and loving! I could not have done this alone! I did not do this alone. I am not alone and this too shall pass right? Gonna hit a meeting tonight my sponsor is going through some shit and needs a hug! That’s how this works right?

It’s Tuesday but feels like Monday! Addicts can and do recover! We do find a new way to live! This one’s for you, Steve! This one for you Dad! Today is for all of those I lost, we lost! This one’s for all of those who stared at the god damn phone all night waiting for they money to come through! This one is for those who can’t see a way out! It’s a bumpy ride! Better buckle up! 15 months……

To those of you out there in the grip, I pray. Let me in or let me down. God bless and stay up. I love you and you matter to me!21326002_458191297897987_2097652103_n

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