Dark Fields…

Good morning out there. I fell asleep-so I forgot to die today. Did you hear what it was, exactly, that I had to fucking say???

I’m in it to win it but I could not take it one more god damn minute! It’s over already-before it even started- it’s finished!

The things that go on in my head-the pain-oh my god the PAIN! Could you understand? Maybe someday I’ll attempt to explain…

Don’t do anything they say-when I don’t know what to do. So, sit here I will while I stare at the moon. The sunrise cannot get here too soon and I no longer look for peace in what cooks in a spoon.

I’m about to drop some truth like a motha-fuckin nuke! It’s real shit! Please keep reading! Don’t stop! Don’t quit! Read the words I write-listen to what I have to say, but mostly, watch what it is I do! Please don’t judge me for I am for real when I say, “I love you”!

Sit still and Breathe Blackwell got me gaspin for air-coughin and spittin!                                                                  Backsliddin-studder-steppin-Trippin                                                               Two steps forward and one step back, I close my eyes and I hope for the Black!

I’m not just addicted to drugs. I’m not just addicted to alcohol! Why can’t you all just read the writing? It’s right there on the wall! —> I’m addicted to MORE! I’m addicted to women and cash-You know the ones, with that fast ass?!!??

I’m a man of many faces-they are fluid and change with the times and as I enter different spaces. But they are real! ANd they are MINE! That smile though…Is it real or am I faking?–I guess it’s for granted sometimes I am taken!

Sit still now Blackwell, and BLEED! to be lost and found?? Nah, I’ve been FREED!

Questioning my beliefs and turning over a new leaf-why can’t I just get some fucking relief??!!

To those of you out there in the grip, I hope. We do recover! Look around! I am Jay and I am an addict. Let me in or just let me down! Stay up. Stay human. I love you and you matter to me!16931015_367008577016260_426413000_o (1)

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