It Begins when It Ends…


I need to be bled out! I woke up feeling sicker than ever before! As privileged as a whore! It is time to even the score! ! Redemption-the red dead kind! I look but I cannot find! Hemingway says “there is nothing to writing, all you have to do is sit down and bleed emotion”. but this is not the sort of bleeding out that will do anything anymore! Where’s that witch doctor with the magic potion? From the Sea of fears to drowning in the Ocean! The Ocean of dreams! Things are never what they seem! The world after seven am is too full of greed and overflowing with corruption!

——->An Illustrative matter that bleeds<——-

You can look, but don’t touch as this is about to be too much! I feel as if I have already been bled out but not in the manner by which I am talking about here. To be bled, to emit or loose, to feel sympathetic grief or anguish, to exude! Blackwell, YOU CAN’T DO THAT! I just did dude! To run together or to be diffused!!!!! Running through a layer of paint as a stain! To DRAIN or to draw off! SIt still and breathe and all I do is cough! Sit still and put the leaches on me! Take it! Take this away! I don’t want it no more! I want things to go back to the way they were before! Before I was made to feel like such a whore! Paid company! I’m deaf, can’t talk and now I no longer see!

Somebody call a medic! I just cut myself and I don’t regret it! But it’s not blood that pools on the floor! No no! It’s so much more! Tears and sweat and dreams! They flow with force and without meaning, streaming! All I can do is watch, weak at the knee’s, leaning! It’s an artificial red, pretty soon I’ll be dead! Soul Loss! It’s long been gone, stirring about wondering what in the fuck this is all about! Listening as I scream, as I shout!

It starts to get dark and I think at least I did my part. I felt it once, in my heart. SO I lay back and finish my smoke and laugh and think, What a fucking joke! Facing my biggest fear as I watch the last tear…It will only Begin once it has ended!WIN_20180307_09_24_52_Pro (2)

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