The night sky is upon me at last! Looking into the mirror, the only one with the view of the rear! I did it! I ditched the needle and found a new use for the spoon, but what am I to do with all this fear!?!? Is now too soon?!
Please, let me start with a quote that’ll knock your fucking eyeballs out?!
“If there were no eternal consciousness in a man, if at the foundation of all lay only a wildly seething power, which writhing with obscure passions, produced everything that is great and everything that is insignificant, if a bottomless void never satiated, lay hidden beneath all-what then would life be, but despair”? Soren Kierkegaard…
I hurt! And bad! I have been really bitter lately, and sad! It has piled up so god damn high that I have trouble remembering the how or the why it got so bad! I keep looking for the mind that I once thought I had…
Compulsory Behavior! Rumination in the fucken dark! In the absence of light and without a spark! My next few words may break your heart! But, 4 min and 23 seconds in, my heart stops beating as I allow you to push that knife deeper and deeper and from within!
This Repugnant aspect of faith, has become more than I can stand, let alone take! Ima rewrite some things that have already been read! Then I am going repeat some things i Have already SaId! Then, and only then, will I say the things that you have never fucking heard! Sit back and relax as I part the waters of motherfucking words!
NUMB WITHOUT DRUGS! I thought to myself, “how could things get any worser”? and as i pondered on how to explain this, all I could do was stare at this blank god damn cursor!
I cannot find a shield for this darkness! So, it is here I sleep on this motherfucken park bench!
Black-mother-Fucking-Sabbath and Albert Camus! What about Schopenhauer? How about you bow lower???!!!
“The man of virtue, too, helps the unfortunate, but not, or almost not, out of pity, but prompted by an urge which is begotten by the excess of power”! Nietzsche. Won’t somebody please, fucken help me???
Please, go and get the Leeches! For I need somebody to fucken BLEED me! Have you not heard about me and how Quite Absurd I can be???!!! Absurdity!
My only wish is to just remain this insane! Pursuance does not=Affirmation! Allow me to reclaim what is rightfully mine! It’s okay now if you must turn a blind eye because I can no longer be the one you turn to when it is your turn to die! Give in to the Reclamation as I redefine Sublimation! “Let me in or Let me Down”, said the King that never wore a crown!
My History of thoughts are Built on Thinking and Building and not being bought! I am old but will never allow myself to be SOULD!!!!!!!
Outside, it’s brewing up a nasty! But, inside though, Inside me, my voice is raspy and low and I am thinking things your mind will never know, thoughts that are just fucking nasty!
To Be Continued…
Stay up. Stay Human too though!